Shared Trouble - Genderswap
by Shadow-Cipher
Summary: Change can be startling, especially when it's against your will. Kallen simply can't come to terms with her sudden transition to male, but she'll quickly find that Lelouch understands her problem greatly. This is my first genderswap, so take it with a grain of salt.


A shiver rushed through Kallen's spine as she stared seamlessly into the mirror. She had been staring at herself for what seemed like hours, and still couldn't wrap her head around it.

 _Her._

All throughout life, Kallen had been female, and certainly had the body to prove it. What exactly had occurred was unknown, but one thing was for certain, and that was something was genuinely wrong. There was really no way to explain the situation, and Kallen struggled with every internal thought as she pondered the situation. The anatomy might have been male as the lacking of breasts, the bobbing Adams apple, and the unwelcome present downstairs certainly gave it away, but something inside felt wrong to use the pronoun male. She wasn't male. She was a woman.

How did she end up in this situation?

How? That was a good question.

The last time she had looked in a mirror, there was definitely a woman staring back at her, but now the gruff face of a man reflected back at her. Thick chin, blocky head, no arguments of the masculine shape. She tried to recall previous events, fought with her heart to stop focusing entirely on the sudden change in gender. She recalled going out on a mission with Zero, taking down numerous enemies. She had stopped for a moment to speak with Zero as he called her to his side. She arrived to defend him, the two of them were directly shot by an unseen enemy, by the foe never returned, was never found. Far as she knew, no one was even aware of whom had taken that shot at the two of them.

Upon arriving back at the current headquarters of the Black Knights, she had felt shaky, her body giving up its energy and threatening to take her down. The others had been celebrating a victory, drinking, cheering, chatting. They had all been too focused to notice Kallen acting strange. She had thrown a nervous fleeting glance to Zero, the only one likely to notice, before slipping from the room. He had been isolated to a far corner, distanced greatly from the others as if they weren't worth his attention. He was searching the room, but as far as she could tell, even he hadn't seen her flee.

At that moment, it wasn't entirely clear to her she had been changing genders. Even as a burning pain entered her body and the first changes took place, the events simply didn't register. It wasn't until she collapsed to her knees in an empty hallway and clutched her hand to her chest, heart crying out at her, that she noticed something wrong. Panic had entered her system as she noted her breasts quickly retracting into her chest, and in a frenzy, she had pulled herself towards the nearest restroom.

Upon arrival, the physical pain had stopped, and she had looked in the mirror to see a man. Still, her emotions were that of a woman, and while most men would take a crisis without a tear, she simply started to shiver and sob, as women often would when distressed.

How long before anyone noticed she was missing? Someone was bound to come looking for her, and they would clearly notice the difference.

There was no hiding her current gender alignment, no masking it to the others. They would see the physical differences, the stocky body, the missing curves, a male figure would be impossible to hide, especially in her given attire.

Her entire body continued to shake as she placed her thick palms on the sink counter. There were no true words to express this, and it was likely to remain as such.

Kallen's hands continued to shiver as she reached for the faucet handle. She could barely hold herself steady, hands quivering with weakness as she wrapped them around the handle. Worry, fret, all that caused her to behave erratically. Water began to pour from the faucet, likely drowning out the sounds of her sobs. Even her voice would've given away her gender position. Her usually sharp and vivid voice had been reduced to a low grumble, a deep, low tone rushing from between her lips. The crying alone would give her gender away. Several times did she splash water on her face, the cold liquid dripping down her cheeks, over her lips, and making a small mess on the counter itself as small puddles formed. Icy water mixed with tears and the two became indistinguishable from each other.

 _I'm dreaming._

 _I was knocked out during the fight and now I'm imagining all of this._

 _I'm going to wake up, eyes staring at me and asking with concern if I'm feeling alright._

 _And I'm going to laugh at this._

She just had to wake herself up by any means necessary. Something, anything to get herself out of this terrifying dream. She continued to splash water on her face vigorously, eyes closed to prevent the water from filling up under her sockets. Soon she would open her eyes, and hopefully something would change. If she was still standing in the bathroom, but was female again, that would be enough. She promised not to question it if that happened.

Soon, Kallen stopped throwing water on herself, her face already drenched as it was. She pulled back her hands and slowly opened her eyes. The remnants of water raced down her face and dribbled off her chin, and the blur of white became slowly clear.

She was still in the bathroom. The mirror was foggy. All she could see was the outline of a shape, blurred over by the dampness that had formed on the mirror. Balling a fist up, she quickly rubbed the thin layer of water off the mirror.

A man was still staring back at her. Nothing had changed. Either Kallen wasn't asleep, or this was a nightmare that was impossible to wake up from.

The room grew silent, as even her sobbing had given up on her. Hope seemed lost, and her eyes glazed partially as she started down at the puddles on the counter, vague outlines of parts of her face reflecting in them.

Kallen nearly jumped out of her skin as a loud banging echoed on the door. She stifled a scream, luckily, but upon jumping, banged her hand on a nearby container of soap, knocking it over with a vivid clang. She attempted to remain quiet, but the loud bang of the soap container being knocked over had efficiently given away that someone was already in this bathroom. Even if she had been perfectly quiet, it wouldn't have done much good. The door wasn't locked, so someone could've easily sauntered in. Even if she had locked the door, the person on the other side would've figured someone was in the bathroom, as they would've had to be to lock the door in the first place. Kallen's first instinct was to howl as the individual to go away, but that wouldn't work. Her male voice would stick out. She kept silent, pleading whoever it was would give up and go away, lose interest, anything.

"Kallen, are you in there?" the newcomer asked.

The strangely filtered voice of Zero immediately caught Kallen's attention. Still, something seemed a trifle off, even as the voice was fed into the filter. She knew what he sounded like without the mask - she had spoken to Lelouch enough times to know this - and something seemed off.

Kallen didn't answer. How could she answer?

As expected, the door swung open. Standing in the doorway was Zero himself, cloak drawn over him, helmet firmly planted on his head. Kallen had expected some reaction out of Zero, panic or wonder or even shock, but he simply stood there and stared, mindlessly keeping his attention held on Kallen even as she shook, and stuttered, failing to keep herself steady. This wasn't like her at all.

"Zero… Lelouch… I don't…." She had almost said 'I can explain', which she clearly knew she couldn't.

"No need, Kallen," Lelouch answered firmly, unmoving, unwavering.

"I don't know how this happened. I just don't understand." Kallen tried to steady her voice, but made only a little headway.

"Neither do I, but there's no need to fret over it," Lelouch droned on.

"How did you know I was in here? I didn't tell anyone I was leaving." Kallen wondered as she spoke how Lelouch could be so calm about this situation. He spoke to her like nothing had changed, like she was the same old person. It was a little unnerving, but at the same time, she appreciated the support.

Lelouch chuckled a little, a short sound that was both comforting and disturbing at the same time. "You forget my powers of observation. I was quietly observing you the entire time. I was observing everyone, to a degree. I noticed you shivering a little during the celebration. I saw your symptoms increase in strength and numbers. When I saw you dash from the room, I pondered if you were suffering the same problem as I, if someone else had been given the same change I had."

Kallen was baffled, and justified in asking, "What do you mean?"

There was a slow pause, a moment of sincere silence where a pin could've been heard dropping. Lelouch failed to move, and Kallen merely stared back at him. She was pondering internally his words.

 _He couldn't have suffered the same thing I have._

 _Did he?_

"I can see you don't understand" As he began his sentence, Lelouch lifted his hands, wrapping his fingers around his helmet and pulling it away from his head, his voice drastically changing mid-sentence as he was separated from the filter "what I'm talking about." Sharp eyes stared back at Kallen. "Does this help anything?"

The voice which spoke to Kallen was sweet, a sharply pitched voice which shot out words at a tone unfamiliar to Lelouch. His voice was clearly feminine, and there was no mistaking the shape of his face, or the sudden increased length of his hair. Soft eyes stared at her, and while they were still filled with confident determination, they had a partially innocent glitter to them as well.

"Lelouch…!" Kallen had no words.

It was now Lelouch drew back his cloak, as if making his gender alignment fully clear to Kallen. The cloak had done an efficient job at hiding the female body contained underneath. The round lumps on his chest, the curves of his hips, they had all been lost underneath the cloak. Now many questions raced through Kallen's head. She wondered how they had both suffered this. She questioned how long he had been like this. Had he switched genders before or after Kallen had, or had it happened at the same time? She had to ponder if when she had thrown Zero a nervous glance in the previous chambers, a fleeting scan with the eyes to confirm he was not watching her, if he had already been female then.

"Do you…" Still no words. Or rather, few words that didn't piece together well.

"The only thing I can think is that it was our mystery attacker." Lelouch added, seeming fairly unfazed by his current situation. "You and I were the only ones that were stricken by the stranger. Given that factor, and that we were never able to track down or even confirm his or her presence, and then add that we seem to be the only ones who have abruptly changed genders, it seems likely that person is out culprit. I am uncertain as to why someone would go through the effort of simply changing out genders. It doesn't seem necessary. Still, it happened."

Kallen finally managed to form a sentence. Lelouch seemed so oblivious to this change that it made her feel weak to be so heavily affected by it. "Did the change hurt for you, too?" She finally inquired.

Lelouch nodded. "Yes. It happened when I was alone, so no one noticed." He tilted his head. "Are you scared, Kallen? Scared of this change?"

"Are you?" Kallen challenged, regaining a little confidence.

It took a few moments for Lelouch to gather his words, almost as if he were uncertain of an appropriate reply. Then, his eyes trailed back to Kallen, and he replied firmly. "Yes and no. At first, I was fully intimidated. I mean, it doesn't stop me from being Zero in any given way. You made it firmly clear to me that my gender difference is entirely lost in translation without my removal of the helmet or cloak. However, this doesn't mean it won't affect me personally. For one, think of those I care for outside of the Black Knights. Surely they would be confused about this situation. My life would be very strange. All the women whom previously showed attraction to me would second guess their choices. Men might now approach me, seeing I am their target. In their minds, I look female, but in my mind, I am still a man. Just the thought of living as a different gender is certainly a concerning concept, not something I was prepared to partake in, especially with zero consideration of the consequences." He smiled at Kallen as a short pause stole his conversation, as he inhaled before continuing. "Even considering all that, there's a part of me that isn't at all worried, that feels no fear."

Partly uncertain of her choice of actions, Kallen interrupted Lelouch, asking, "How can you not be afraid?"

Lelouch's smile widened. "I'm not afraid, Kallen, because I have you by my side." Kallen's cheeks flushed red, and she found herself speechless. "You and I can - no we will - get through this together."

Lelouch moved in closer to Kallen, wrapping his arms around her body. His newly formed breasts pushed against her firm, flat chest, and it certainly felt strange. Still, even as a woman, Kallen saw the same person reflected back in the eyes which stared at her. The body was not the Lelouch she was used to, but the personality, the heart, the soul, it all was the same. His body was new, but he had not changed a bit.

"At least Lulu will sound a little more fitting for me now, don't you think?" Lelouch asked with a cheeky grin.

Kallen blushed deeper, and with that, felt worry melt away from her. Yes, this was a confusing moment in her life, and it would be a huge change if things could never be corrected, but something within felt satisfied in the notion that this life changing event would not be something she would have to incur alone. Lelouch would be there, adapting as well. The two could teach each other, learn from the life of the opposite person. With time, they could grow into it. They could grow together.

To show off a newfound confidence, Kallen suddenly dragged Lelouch into a kiss. Her eyes fluttered closed as she felt her lips firmly pressed up against his, and he too submitted to the moment. With eyes closed, neither party felt anything was different. When the world was black, Kallen almost forgot she was a man kissing a woman. Instead, she was simply Kallen kissing Lelouch. Gender wouldn't change their love for each other, and Kallen had been foolish to think it would. Lelouch had known, and that's why he had been confident.

 _I will always love you, Lelouch, male or female._

 _Always be confident, Kallen. Gender will not change my feeling for you._

 _I promise._


End file.
